I know that I am usually the first to tell women to speak up.
In fact, it’s my great big reason for being in this business…but today I have to tell you to shut up.
I want you to stop telling yourself that you aren’t a “doer”, as if it’s some kind of magical ability some people are born with, leaving the rest of us to a life sentence of unfinished projects, post-it-note piles of somedays, overwhelmed ulcer-tummies and major, major follow-through-guilt.
It’s not true, and it’s messing with your brilliant plans.
There are no magical doers out there who just pop out of bed with the ability and motivation to conquer each tedious task on their To-Do list. Nobody has an inner magic wand that smooths out all of the rough spots in a project or a crystal ball to foresee all possible set-backs they may meet along the way.
Each of us struggle with reaching our goals.
We all have a zillion ideas rolling around in our heads. We all have moments when we just know that our major insight about a new product or creative venture could lead to the next best thing since glitter pens, but if you are a creative person you’re going to make a mess…and that’s perfect for growing those wicked ideas, but it makes follow-through really difficult.
So we sit in our glitter-y, washi-taped studios (or at our laptops and notebooks), and we blame our incompletes on some lacking in ourselves – some missing piece of genetic material that could help us bring our idea-babies into the world.
We feel increasingly bogged-down by the potential of our plans: the perfection of the ideal. Then, we start thinking about how we might do it and start scribbling down even more ideas in our notebooks. It all gets unwieldy and overwhelming, and we start to even wonder about whether or not it would even work out anyway.
This is the beginning of the end. Nothing works when it’s not done. The only way to get that idea ready to work out…is to give it a chance.
Then we look at those other people out there who are finishing things and making cool stuff happen, and we imagine that they must have that missing ingredient. We feel alone and they seem to be surrounded by a golden nimbus of “CAPABLE”.
They are magical “Doers” who always succeed…not like the rest of us.
I tell myself that lie ALL THE TIME! I used to say, “There are just some people who are doers, and I’m not a doer; I come up with ideas, but I can’t finish them” all the time. In fact, I came really close to grabbing that old hat and tossing it back on again last month.
I’ll talk about it more in the next few weeks, but I hit all of the roadblocks last month. After spending all of December planning out a shiny new year, my whole family took turns getting sick and then we were snowed in and sick again (and snowed in 3 more times…and then sick again); projects got tricky and took more time and energy than I planned for, and I let a bunch of my ideas and plans for the month slide into the pile of somedays.
I started to tell myself that it was because I’m not a doer and it’s all my fault…
Hi My name is Kris, and I was full of crap. I was wrong, and you are too.
I sent out the friend-bat-signal, and went to my very best friend’s house for coffee. I told her about my disappointments and frustrations and vented. She gave me coffee and cookies, and her adorable little son played play-doh with me until I felt like a good person again.
And I remembered this:
…and they probably needed to have a play-doh play-date to get there too.
There are people who have pushed themselves; there are people who have reached out and asked someone they trust to push them too, and there are people who have set their jaw in a resolute line and straight-up bulldozed through their own self-limiting thoughts.
Those are the people you use against yourself.
I’m serious. This is the worst part…because you know it’s not real, but you do it anyway.
You look at them and see only their results, and you use those results as proof that you aren’t good enough. You choose to ignore the glint of exhaustion in their eye, or the memory of their recent Haigen-Daz-hibernation posts on Facebook, and you grasp on to that finished project as the defining difference between them and you.
I promise you that if you ask any of the people you see creating – actively starting and finishing creative stuff – how their process went, from start to finish? They will tell you about their pre-play-doh moments, and you will bond over how hard it is to just get over the “but not me” crap we all do to ourselves and succeed in bringing your ideas to life.
They are no more doers than you are. They just did it – and you will too.
SO! I’m going to put my eyebrow down now, and give you a little something to print out and look at when you need a little play-doh.
…it’s not play-doh…
BUT! It’s a cute printable, and it could help you bust out of an I-will-never-follow-through slump.
Click on the image below and print the cuteness.
Then get back to work!
Because you are a doer too, Kitten.
I’m going to get back to work now too. I know I promised you more info about my VIP days, so check it out here. It’s kind of an awesome thing, if I do say so myself.
Sign up for Tuesday Tips in your inbox to hear more about things around here FIRST and receive freebies like this one – as soon as I make them.
I will see you here next week again, for more Tuesday Tips to help you raise your Voice! In the meantime, you can hang up a little cute motivation and start thinking about what you really want to achieve this year.
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